Thursday, 12 March 2015

Life in a Converted Transit Van - Part 1

The first rule of living in a van. Do not step in a bag of your own shit. 

I bought a Suncamp Lulu toilet, I was rather impressed by it. It works, is sturdy and most importantly, fits under my chair. A tip I learn elsewhere - put cat littler in the bottom. Helps to soak up any accidents. I put a bag into the toilet, then some news paper. Then I do my business and put it in the bin. We are no longer leaving it outside for 5 minutes whilst we find shoes. We will now walk in the cold to ensure no more accidental stepping. I was unprepared for the amount of poo that leaves me on a regular basis. I wish I was a rabbit.

What does this have to do with life on the van. Everything, if like you you won't have a flushable toilet. Or a light switch. Or a tap. Thankfully, I have a kettle. 

I moved into the van on the 1st March. And yes, I know I haven't even written about the conversion. I've decided this is a backwards blog, and you'll just have to keep up.

Five things I can't live without on my van:
Candles [ambiance, heat and light all for 4 pence an hour]
Handwash/antibacterial gel [everything is so dirty]
Dressing Gown [I'm convinced it just makes me feel warmer looking at it]
Slippers [can't have a house without slippers]
Kettle [no explanation required]

Obviously I could say some sensible things like a woodburning stove, hot water, 230v sockets and such other expensive things, but alas, I don't have them. 

I will be buying a stove from the Fireweaver. He comes highly recommended from hippy folk and hand makes the stoves and he fits them. If he would just move his entire life closer to London, I'd appreciate it. I'm looking forward to getting one in the winter - it'll be lovely and warm, free hot water and free fuel as long as I can be bothered to chop it.

How on earth, I, a Londoner has decided to live in a van, I'll never know. But I do, most people think I'm mad, but such is life. 

I've managed 12 nights, which is 11 more than anyone thought I'd last!

1 comment:

  1. I love this blog. You're hilarious.